By Jamie Richards
A gay guy kicked out by parents after coming out has learned his mom and dad told everyone he’s a ‘sex offender’. Writing on Reddit, a 22-year-old guy has written asking for advice after his explosive coming out.
‘I had lived with my parents and my two younger sisters (Anne, 16 and Beth, 17) my whole life. My parents have always been on the conservative side, and while they were somewhat strict, they were loving and responsible parents. I knew they disapproved of “the gay lifestyle”,’ he said.
‘Around age 18 I started to realize I was gay and I spent the next few years working up courage/deciding whether to tell them. I was able to tell Beth. She was super supportive of me. I thought I was close enough with my dad that I could tell him, but I was wrong.
‘I was viciously berated and told I would go to hell and tarnish the family name if I didn’t go to therapy to “fix” me.’ But he refused and his mom and dad kicked him out.
‘I was devastated and so were my sisters. They tried to change my parents’ minds but my parents threatened to kick them out too. They aren’t ready to live on their own so they didn’t have much of a choice. ‘So I packed up my shit and left. I got myself a cheap room in the next town with what I could afford with my job.’
A few months have passed now, and he now has a new boyfriend in his roommate.
Mom and dad told family he’s a ‘sex offender.’ ‘I haven’t spoken a word to my parents, but I’ve kept in touch with Beth and Anne. My parents have strictly banned them from seeing or speaking to me because they think my “gayness” will “infect” them,’ he said.
‘But anyway, this morning Beth called me to talk about family holiday plans. Turns out my parents told my entire extended family that I committed sexual assault, am now a sex offender, and thus been banned from family holidays.
‘However, nobody believed them. I like my extended family and they like me, so I’m not sure why my parents thought this lie would gain any traction…but fortunately it didn’t. ‘Beth said she and Anne talked to a lot of them and told them the truth.’
And thankfully, it did not go in the parents’ favor.
Parents receive backlash from relatives for kicking out gay son
‘Once they found out my parents actually kicked me out for being gay, they were outraged,’ he said. ‘Many of them lean conservative as well, but they strongly disagreed with my parents’ decision and ridiculed them. ‘And now, as a result, my parents have “realized their mistake” and they want to reach out to me and apologize.’
And this is where we get to the part where he needs advice. ‘My mom left a voicemail an hour ago and I don’t know how to respond to it.
‘They have un-banned me from the upcoming Thanksgiving gathering, and while I’d love to go and see my relatives, I’m furious that my parents not only kicked me out for being myself, but also lied to my family to vilify me and absolve themselves of any guilt.
‘I don’t want to see them or talk to them at all right now, and not for the foreseeable future. What should I do?’
What should this gay guy do?
And Reddit was quick with the advice.
One simply said: ‘Don’t.
‘Your parents aren’t “regretful”, they are being shamed socially and want relief from that. I doubt they have changed their mind at all.
‘Your parents are horrible human beings and deserve to be ostracized.
‘Maybe you and your new boyfriend can have Thanksgiving somewhere else. Invite your sisters and not your parents.’
Another said: ‘Dear fucking god these people need to be flushed down the sewer like the pieces of smelly shit they are. They deserve nothing but your contempt and the contempt of all the people they’ve lied to.’
And what he did next.
In a minor update, he said: ‘I’m going to talk to my aunt (the host) and see what can be done about my parents.
‘I can’t decide if I should decline the event or go anyway just to spite my parents, but I’m probably going to be miserable either way.
‘One of my cousins has already reached out to me and invited me to her nuclear family’s personal dinner.’